FRIENDS WITH KIDS

US, 2011, 107 minutes, Colour.
Adam Scott, Jennifer Westfeldt, Jon Hamm, Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolph, Chris O’ Dowd, Megan Fox, Edward Burns.
Directed by Jennifer Westfeldt.

Five year engagements, what to expect when you’re expecting, friends with kids… what are the questions Hollywood is raising for 2012? The target audience seems to be those in their 30s who are faced with issues of commitment, relationships, marriage, pregnancy, family, rearing of children. What are the rest of us to think as we look on? And question ourselves?

The screenplay was written by Jennifer Westfeldt who takes on the central role of Julie, in her later 30s by the end of the film who has had a long relationship which ended badly. She is on the lookout for love (not quite believing that she could be really loved) and, as she sees her friends with kids, is powerfully aware of the ticking of the biological clock. Should she simply get pregnant? By whom? Since high school, her best friend has been Jason, but he is not attracted to her in terms of a permanent relationship. In his 30s, he is stuck in his adolescent desires and sexual urges – and, as for children…

The friends with kids include a married couple with several. Maya Rudolph as Leslie spends a lot of time being frantic, especially when visitors are coming to dinner. Alex, Chris O’ Dowd, doesn’t seem fazed at all. Then there are Missy, Kristin Wiig, and Ben, Jon Hamm, who have a baby. You can tell that this latter couple is drifting steadily towards the rocks. Julie does pal up with Mr Perfect, Edward Burns, who is charmingly sensitive and has grown up children. Jason, on the other hand, is swept off his feet by a young actress, Megan Fox, who loathes the idea of commitment – and children.

The film traces the interactions of these characters over the years, including Julie’s pregnancy (yes, it is Jason, but solely as a kind of contract for shared responsibility for their son and freedom for seeking other partners). Maybe the ending is too much what we might have expected (dramatically speaking that is), but while we have dramas in real life, a moral ending is what most people hope for. Which means that, ultimately, this film for 30-somethings wants to make a strong affirmation about children and parenting with love and selflessness.


1. Audience – parents, thirtysomethings and family-oriented audiences, those with concerns about children and family?

2. The film as an urban comedy, romantic, city life, couples, jobs, marriage, unmarried couples, pregnancy, children and family, home life, problems?

3. The issue of having children, in love, in marriage? Women and the biological clock ticking, planning parenting? Theoretical? In fact?

4. The screenplay and the focus on Jason and Julie? The supporting couples, individuals? The various strands and subplots interwoven with the story of Jason and Jules, their relationship, the pregnancy?

5. The introduction to Jason and Jules, the phone calls in the morning, their playing the deadly option game, their respective partners? Casual sex? The long friendship, Julie and the bad ending of her relationship? Their talking, frank, the friends, going out together?

6. The dinner, Leslie and Alex, Missy and Ben? The reaction to the children in the restaurant? Their arrogant attitude? The future and pregnancies?

7. The passing of four years, the party for Jason, gifts, people arriving, Jason and Jules, Leslie and her being frantic, reprimanding Alex, his being a slacker, the kids and their playing up, the noise? Missy and the baby, bringing it to the meal? The meal, tensions, talk?

8. The importance of talk in the film, ideas, especially Jason and Jules, the discussion about pregnancy, family, rearing children? Reaction talk? The importance of Ben’s speech and his denunciation of the plan, the denunciation of Jason? How much truth in his criticism of Jason?

9. Julie and Jason, the clock ticking, their discussions, the decision to have the baby, the awkwardness of their experience, their agreement, sharing responsibilities and time, yet keeping their freedom to date others, the sequence of the birth, Jason’s reactions and concern?

10. Leslie and Alex, their life together, frantic, periods of calm, Alex and his offhand manner, yet their love for each other, their children? Alex and his jokes, the bond between them?

11. The year of Joe’s growing up? Jason and his meeting with Mary Jane, her being young, acting, selfish, her explanation of herself at the table? Jason and his reliance on sexual experience, surprise?

12. Julie, meeting Kurt, his story, leaving his wife, his adult children, talking, his attraction, his consideration, kindness, looking after the children, relationship with Joe? Jason and his being irritated? At the chalet? His staying in to help the women and the housekeeping?

13. The New Year, the gathering, tensions, Ben and Missy and their clashes, telling the truth about Jason? Going out – and the skiing?

14. Jason meeting Ben in the bar, the apology, Jason admitting the truth? Ben admitting the truth about his relationship with Missy?

15. Jason and his breaking with Mary Jane? Julie and her going to meet Kurt’s children, his dropping out of the picture?

16. Julie, the date with Jason, coming on to him, explaining things, his fear and walking out?

17. Julie moving, with Joe? Jason and Mary Jane at the restaurant and seeing the children, her arrogant comments?

18. Jason and his going to the apartment, the confrontation with Julie, explanations, sincerity, love, best friends, their each understanding the other, their love for Joe?

19. The film as a moral fable? The range of couples and their experiences? The importance of children, the rearing of children, in love?