LOVE IS STRANGE

US, 2014, 94 minutes, Colour.
Alfred Molina, John Lithgow, Marisa Tomei, Darren Burrows, Charlie Tahen.
Directed by Ira Sachs.

A rather unfortunate title for a very gentle film. The love presented here is not accepted by many individuals, communities, even countries. It is same-sex love. However, this description does not quite do justice to the treatment of the theme in this film. It is a film that can be watched, calmly and with emotional interest, by most adult audiences. The emphasis is on loving emotion and commitment and does not dwell on the sexual behaviour of men in this kind of commitment.

The film does open with a same-sex marriage ceremony. The two participants have been together for 40 years. They are played, with energetic verve, by John Lithgow and with a gentle honesty by Alfred Molina. It is to the credit of these two actors that the film is emotionally persuasive, no matter what the moral stances of the audience. The other credit is to the writing by director Ira Sachs and his cowriter, Daniel .

The film takes for granted the relationship of the two men, Ben (Lithgow) a gallery manager and a painter, and George (Molina) a music teacher and choir conductor at a local Catholic school. As regards George and his presence in the school, the principal and staff, including priests, are aware of his relational situation. However, once he participates in the public union, the diocese feels that this public statement is not compatible with his role in the school and he is dismissed. The scene where he discusses the situation with one of the priests, a friend, does raise the issues of governments accepting same-sex ceremonies and the witness that that this gives to students in the school.

George’s losing his job changes the situation for both men, their not being able to afford their apartment. There is a meeting of their relatives and friends who all have an idea of what they should do for both men. The upshot is that Ben goes to live with his sympathetic nephew Elliot (Darren Burrows), the nephew’s wife, a writer, Kate (Marisa Tomei) and their teenage son, Joe (Charlie Tahen). George goes to stay with two gay friends, both policemen.

Much of the film shows, sometimes with humour, sometimes with wry feeling, the joys as well as the difficulties of these arrangements. In fact, Ben talks incessantly, shares a room with Joe much to Joe’s chagrin, especially when he wants privacy and working with a fellow-student on projects from school. Kate is sometimes driven demented by Ben’s incessant talk. On the other hand, George, a more simple and introverted soul, is content with his lot, even when his hosts put on a noisy party.

There is some solution for the two, even as they have to make arrangements to meet, coming from their different homes. There is a fine scene after they attend a concert where they reminisce about their past, Ben confesses to some failures in the relationship, George exercises his good-nature and patience.

There is a pleasing conclusion to the film, with some sadness, especially with Joe who has found dealing with Ben rather difficult, coming to George and treating him as a confidant for his questions about life.

Love is Strange is a very wide-audience friendly film about two gay men.

1. The title, love not strange, different from the mainstream but gentle?


2. The director, writing, the gay perspective, interests and concerns?

3. The perspective on relationships, unions, marriages, love and affection, struggle and survival? No focus on the physical aspects of homosexual sexuality?

4. The introduction, Ben and George getting up, dressing for the ceremony, the housekeeper, the fuss? The wedding ceremony, the people present, the applause? Kate and her speech, her writing and her husband’s artwork, Ben’s nephew, knowing the couple for many years? The expensive honeymoon – only the later reference verbally?

5. Introduction to Ben, the type, his age, at 70, flamboyant, his galleries, his work and painting, his being prone to talk and chat?

6. The contrast with the introduction to George, the formal choir, the singing in the church, an ordinary man? The discussions with the priest, knowing him for years, the fact of his homosexuality and living with Ben, the students accepting this in the school? The role of the diocese, the authorities, the same-sex marriage as a public statement? George having to be fired instantly? The sympathy of the priest, yet society’s attitudes towards same-sex marriages? Catholic Church stances?

7. The financial situation, having to sell the apartment, calling the group of friends, sharing ideas? Strong opinions, assertions, the plan? Ben and his depending on his nephew, Elliot? Kate and Joe? His going, settling in, sharing the room with Joe, the bunks, his sleeping in the afternoon, Joe and the need for privacy, bringing Vlad to share the preparation for the project? Meals and discussions? Kate and her trying to work, Ben and his talking incessantly? Keep trying to be patient, the final exasperation?

8. George, living with the police, settling in, accepting his situation? His visiting the school, seeing the teachers, the new choirmaster? The voice-over of his letter to parents, explaining his situation, asking for their understanding?

9. The meetings with Ben, the concert, the violin?

10. Ben, working on the roof, painting Vlad, Joe and his anger? Elliot’s suspicion about Joe and Vlad? Saying Kate was too kind in her approach? The accident, Ben falling down the stairs? The issue of the disappearing book, Ben sitting and listening to the accusations against Joe, finally saying he took the book? His having to deal with the situation? The family having to deal with it?

11. The socials, the gay clubs? George at home, the party, his being bored, introverted? The chance encounter with Ian, his partner leaving? The talking, both English? Ian as an archaeologist, the offer of the trip to Mexico and the position? The apartment available? His having the key, the offer, George happy to accept?

12. George and Ben, the long final walk in the street, declarations and love, Ben confessing infidelities, their both being at peace? Then turning the corner – and the offscreen death?

13. George, alone, no visuals of the funeral?

14. Joe, the visit, talking, the gift of the painting with Vlad, hanging it on the wall? Joe and his trust in George and George being available from talk?

15. Joe, the girlfriend, the skateboards, going along the street, the visuals of the sky?

16. The musical score – and the continued use of the piano and its effect?