MORTDECAI

US, 2014, 107 minutes, Colour.
Johnny Depp, Gwyneth Paltrow, Ewan McGregor?, Paul Bettany, Olivia Munn, Michael Culkin, Ulrich Thomsen, Jeff Goldblum.
Directed by David Koepp.

Twit? Twittiest!

This is certainly an oddball comedy, a star vehicle for Johnny Depp to do one of his impersonations. He is Lord Mortdecai, allegedly British aristocracy, with country mansion, with a trophy wife who is smarter than he is, Joanna (Gwyneth Paltrow), an art dealer who gets himself involved in frauds. Depp portrays him as one of those silly-ass Englishman, accent, vocabulary-a-twitter, all that can be spoofed about the upper-class.

How his fans might find this a bit difficult to predict – and his wife later in the film remarking that sometimes he can be irritating. However most audiences will become used to this kind of performance – as we have with his Jack Sparrow.

As the film opens, he is involved in double-crossing some Chinese art dealers – but, as always, his loyal, ultra-loyal, manservant, with a gangster’s voice and tone, comes to his rescue, throws the punches, takes the shots, is ever ready to come to the aid of his respected boss. This is Jock, played with an amusing consistency and loyalty by Paul Bettany.

When an art restorer is murdered, and the main suspect is a Latin American terrorist who wants to finance his groups by art sales and who keeps reappearing during the film, a murder or two more, some mayhem, and suffering all kinds of shock tactics during a car chase, Mortdecai is asked to get involved by MI5, represented by Ewan Mc Gregor, playing straight man to Johnny Depp’s antics.

Mortdecai’‘s adventures include his abduction by a Communist art connoisseur and his interrogation in Moscow – with Jock, once again, to the rescue. Then he is off to LA to sell his car to another art connoisseur, Jeff Goldblum. Who has an intriguing daughter who gets up to all kinds of intrigue. Everybody turns up in’s LA, Joanna, the MI5 agent, the terrorist, and Jock, once again to the rescue.

The fraud involves a painting by Goya which seems to have disappeared but has an art history of disappearance, acquisition by Goerring, and several fakes – all of which is exposed in a finale at a London auction.

While watching it, older audiences may be reminded of The Pink Panther, then of Peter Sellers who might have taken on the role had the script been available in his day – and then, there are many Terry- Thomas mannerisms, with Depp even having the gap teeth. Probably Peter sellers would have done the role with much more ease and aplomb.


1. Farcical comedy? The style of humour? Spoofing parody? Satire on the British, accent and manners? The twits, silly-asses?

2. The strength of the Johnny Depp and his presence, impersonation? The musical score and the styles?

3. Britain, the mansion, the world of art? MI5? Moscow and torture? The car chase? Los Angeles, the hotels, the party? The auction?

4. The title, the meaning, the overtones of the name? Charlie being a Lord? His health, wealth, living beyond his means? Joanna’s relationship with him? With Martland?

5. The initial deal, the Chinese, the bowl, wanting his finger, fire, Jock and his fighting? The Chinese, the auction, the thugs watching, torturing Jock? And Charlie’s intervention?

6. The situation of the painting, the murder of the artist, the stealing of the painting, the complex history of the painting, disappearance, recovery, Herman Goering? Transported to LA in the car? In the LA mansion, the party, stealing again, the various fakes, persuading various clients to bid? The list? Joanna and Charlie bidding at the auction?

7. MI5, Martland, in love, Maurice as his assistant? Dealing with Charlie, manipulating him? Protecting Joanna, devotion to her? Charlie returning from Russia, his being drunk, at the airport, in transit to Los Angeles, guarding Joanna at home, following her to Los Angeles, the party, the recovery of the painting, the burning?

8. Joanna, style, Gwyneth Paltrow, the accent? The reaction to her husband? flirtatious? The visit to the old soldier, getting the information, hearing his advances? Martland, his devotion? The phone call from Charlie, going to Los Angeles, the encounter with Charlie, the party, the setup, the recovery of the painting, burning, Georgina and the deal with the terrorist? Going back to the old soldier, his being dead, the painting in his toilet, the recovery? Her presence at the auction, the bidding and the plan?

9. Martland, his work, MI5? His assistant, seemingly normal? The adventures in Los Angeles, the auction, the capture of the terrorist? Joanna refusing him?

10. The terrorist, killing the painter, stealing it, wanting to kill Mortdecai, Jock and the confrontations, car chase, his injuries? In the US, in league with Georgina, the plan, at the party, the bidding for the painting, at the auction, choosing swords and fencing? Arrest?

11. Mortdecai, in Russia, the Russian authority, coveting the painting, his thugs, the abduction, interrogation, threat of torture, Charlie going out the window with Jock’s help? At the auction? Torturing the potential client? Sir Graham? the painting, the auction, his being tortured by the Russians?

12. Jock, as servant, his accent, background, always stepping in, resourceful, his good manners, the finger and the hand, always another!? His being shot, hit? The chase and the driving? His his being saved from the Chinese by Mordechai hitting them? His sexual encounters?

13. The American millionaire, his plans, in league with Spinoza, the garage, Spinoza’s death, the painting the car, transporting it to the US? His admiring the
painting? The murder? Georgina, sexy, collusion, at the auction?

14. The irony of the money from the painting going to pay taxes and commissions?

15. The style of comedy, spoof and parody?