TOGETHER, TOGETHER

US, 2021, 90 minutes, Colour.

Patti Harrison, Ed Helms, Rosalind Chao, Nora Dunn, Fred Melamed, Tig Notaro, Julio Torres, Sufe Bradshaw.

Directed by Nikole Beckwith.

The title is a nice play on words, whether a couple is really together or just together together.

This is a brief film about surrogacy. The film opens with a fortysomething, Matt (Ed Helms) interviewing a young woman in her mid-20s, Anna (an effective presence from Patti Harrison).

The pair come to an agreement about the surrogacy of his child, making a contract. The film is then divided into three sections, for each trimester.

The film’s focus on Matt is that he is growing ever more continually anxious, visiting his brother with his family, his parents, his memories of failed relationships. He accompanies Anna in all kinds of activities, especially to the doctor. He then becomes very attached to her, even inviting her to stay with him.

On the other hand, and it begins as somewhat detached, bad memories of pregnancy and adoption in the past. She is alienated from her family. She works in a diner – with Matt often turning up. She does not want to know the babies gender (Matt does) but she welcomes the interviews with the counsellor, played by Teague Notaro, and is continually challenged by the hardheaded notice at the hospital.

While she appreciates mats concern, even going to stay with him for some time, she is rather insistent on establishing boundaries, something which Matt finds very difficult.

As the film comes to an end, the birth of the baby, the audience is left not knowing the gender of the child, what will be and his response now that the child is born, the effect of the surrogacy experience, and what Matt will do caring for the child.

1. The tone of the title? Father and mother of the child? Surrogacy? Togetherness?
2. The San Francisco settings, homes and apartments, workplaces, hospitals, birthing centres, donors? Atmosphere? The musical score?
3. Introducing Matt and Anna, the interview, the conditions, surrogacy, Matt and his former partner, separated, wanting a family, in his 40s? Anna, teenage pregnancy, giving up the baby for adoption, cut off by her parents? Age 26? Reasons for the surrogacy?
4. The three sections of the film, for each trimester? The development of the pregnancy, preparations for the birth? Matt and his continued concern?
5. The screenplay, the range of uncertain conversations, hesitance, problems, questions? The couple gradually getting to know each other, the nature of friendship, the nature of their love, as manifested throughout the surrogacy?
6. Matt, age, competence, uncertainties? Visiting his brother and the children? His mother forever criticising him? Father, stepfather? His memories of his parents? The visit to the shower? The contrast with Anna, news of her sister, the later phone call, meeting the friend from high school and information getting around? Cut off from her parents, a phone call?
7. The importance of the scenes with the doctor, her listening to each of them, assessing what was happening, advice? The return visits? The visits to the surgery, the ultrasounds, the support of the doctor? The nurse, her listening, not able to comment, privately giving her views, assessments, judgements, implied criticism?
8. Anna, the coffee bar, Julio and the comments? Matt’s visits? The secrecy? Julio learning the truth, his reaction to the clogs, his reaction to Matt, support of Anna?
9. Matt, the continued attention, wanting to be present, the visits, the huge toy, the visits to the shops, the cots and their costs, the discussions about the colour for the room? His books of advice on the meaning of colours? On being a parent?
10. The visits to the birthing centres, Anna, the exercises, the woman presiding, support? Matt, alone, the other couples, the exercises? The gay women and their support?
11. The effect on Anna, the months of carrying the child, the initial sexual relationship and Matt’s reaction, the effect of the discussions with the adviser, the doctors, the nurse? Accepting her bearing the child? The inevitability of giving up the child?
12. The baby shower, the friends, the gifts, the parents, and a feeling that she was excluded?
13. The gender of the child, and not wanting to know, Matt wanting to know, acceding, finding a name, calling the child Lamp temporarily?
14. Anna, staying with Matt, the effect on each of them, the continued issue of boundaries?
15. Time coming close, going to hospital, the exercises, the birth sequence, the effect on Anna, the effect on Matt?
16. The film ending, the audience not knowing the gender of the child? And speculation as to what would happen about Matt and Anna, fathering, together…?