MY SAILOR, MY LOVE

Ireland/Finland, 2022, 103 minutes, Colour.

James Cosmo, Brid Brennan, Catherine Walker.

Directed by Klaus Haro.

Here is a drama that can be recommended for the older target audience, audiences who have many memories that they can draw on, happiness, regrets, unhappiness, hopes.

It is a co-production between Ireland and Finland, but with Irish characters and an Irish setting, the beauty of the County Mayo Coast and Islands, mostly overcast and cloudy, perhaps symbolic of the lives that the people lead.

At the centre of the film is an old sea captain, Howard, played by veteran character actor over the years, James Cosmo. He has retired but has many memories of his days at sea, sad memories of the death of his wife, abrupt and sometimes resentful of the care from his daughter, Grace (Catherine Walker). He does have two other sons but they turn up only for his birthday. He is gruff, self-contained, but, in some surprising moments, we see him telling fanciful adventure stories to the delight of some little girls of the family at the local pub.

So far, some identification with Howard, but wariness about him and his gruffness. His exasperated daughter arranges for a local woman, Annie (Brid Brennan) to come twice a week for housekeeping – and she is almost immediately ousted by Howard. We like Annie, her daughters working at the pub, the little grandchildren, and are pained when she is treated so badly. But, fortunately, Howard comes to his senses, get some flowers, comes to apologise to Annie who lets him know how hurt she is.

But, she does come back, Howard mellows (perhaps a bit too dramatically quickly for the film) but, it is a joy to see him come alive, share so much with Annie, she hearing his story and the death of his wife, he hearing her unhappy marriage and her husband’s death. We are very happy to see them both so joyful, sharing so much, he come alive again.

Parallel to this story is Grace’s own story, a marriage which is breaking, her going to therapy and not finding it helpful, her work at the hospital and her being fired, her paying attention to her father, employing Annie, and, perhaps to be expected but regrettably so, her bad reaction to finding the bond between Annie and her father, denouncing her father as a self-centred man in the past, suggesting that he is exploiting Annie.

All of us who have had sadness in the past in our lives will be caught in the emotional crossfire, empathising with one, emphasising with another, trying to understand what is going on.

We get to like Howard very much, even as we acknowledge his being away from his family at sea, even more so as the years passed, the teenage Grace looking after her mother, welcoming her father home, a sense of obligation to care for him in his age and health situation. And we get to like Annie, her joy in her experience of getting to know and love Howard.

So, here is a film that can be recommended to an older audience, no off-putting violence, sex, language, the film having a PG rating because of mature themes.

1. An Irish story? Finland collaboration?
2. A film for older audiences, identification with the characters, their situations, crises, regrets, loves, hopes?
3. County Mayo, the coast, the Bay, the Ireland? Overcast, clouds? Atmosphere? The musical score?
4. The focus on Howard, James Cosmo’s presence, his life as a sea captain, away from home, relationship with his wife, distance, reluctance to come home, the death of his wife, Grace, looking after her mother, waiting for her father, his having to retire, health, living alone, grumpy, crossword puzzles, Grace trying to care for him?
5. Grace, her story, as a child, home from school, looking after her mother, her mother is drowning? A yearning for her father? His absences? Her marriage, the tensions, her mental state, illness, the support group, the other members, the therapy, the leader, Grace and her dissatisfaction, walking out? The tension with her husband, his further job, to go to Munich, the selling of the house, the visit of the estate agent, Grace and her resentment? Her work at the hospital, kindly with the patients? And needing time to care for her father? Her being fired? Getting the further job, with the other nurses? Her husband leaving, the empty house?
6. Grace employing Annie, Annie and her age, her later telling her story, her aggressive husband and his death, her daughters, marriages, the grandchildren, Julie? Work at the hotel? Annie, agreeing to work for Howard, getting the bus, going to the house, preparing the meal, his treatment of her, to never darken his door again? Her being hurt?
7. Howard, change of heart, the flowers, going to apologise to Annie, her reluctance? Howard and the grandchildren, telling the stories of the gorilla? The delighted response?
8. Annie, her return, cooking the meal, Howard setting the place for her, eating together, his change of heart, inviting her to return? The return, cleaning the house, discovering the weaving machine and repairing it, his inviting her to stay, talking with her daughters, her coming, rearranging house, the photos of her family? Going for drives? The bond between them?
9. Howard, the reason for his retirement, concealing it, his turn, the need for a checkup, his covering it over as blood pressure?
10. Grace, arriving, the discovery, upset, the confrontation with the father, confrontation with grace, telling Annie that her father was completely self-centred? The contrast with his behaviour with Annie, the family, joyful in celebration, Grace upset?
11. Annie leaving, Grace coming in wanting to stay, having now home, her father’s reaction?
12. His collapse, hospital, the truth about his illness? Grace planning for him to be at home? Annie and the visit to the hospital? After keeping away? Grace at the hospital?
13. Howard, the recuperation, and his visit, the proposal, the happiness?
14. Howard’s death, and he with him, Grace’s reaction?
15. Grace, coming to terms with her own life, deprivations, her attitude towards her father, love, need? The reconciliation with Annie?