THE WHOLE TEN YARDS

US, 2004, 98 minutes, Colour.
Bruce Willis, Matthew Perry, Amanda Peet, Kevin Pollack, Natasha Henstridge, Frank Collison.
Directed by Howard Deutsch.

With all the best will in the world, it is impossible not to say that this is a very silly film. There was some entertainment in The Whole Nine Yards, the tale of a fashionable but nervous dentist whose wife hires a killer to eliminate him – and who then finds that he actually lives next door to a hitman. Matthew Perry capitalised on his kind of jittery, awkward smiling persona from Friends. Bruce Willis was all crooked smiles.

Here they are again in a plot that twists and turns with very little signalling – and which has to be explained to the dentist (and to us) by the hitman at the end. It is to do with the father of the gangster that Willis killed in the first one, only now we find there was a kind of family relationship and the father, just out of jail, is not happy. The dentist’s wife (formerly the hitman’s wife) is abducted. The hitman’s new wife, who was the killer hired in the first one to get rid of the dentist, wants to do a hit and wants to get pregnant. It may spoil the ending to know that everyone’s wishes are fulfilled – with an extra $280, 000,000 that none of them really need. It is all presented in a silly sitcom kind of way.

1. The popularity of The Whole Nine Yards? The quality of this sequel? Characters, situations, comedy?

2. The Mexican and Los Angeles settings? The 1960s? 2004? The style in Mexico, affluence in the big cities? The world of gangsters? The musical score?

3. The title, its American tone? Achievement – or not?

4. The quality of the dialogue? Characterisations? Thin, silly?

5. The intricacies of the plot? In relationship to the original, Jimmy as a killer, Cynthia as his ex-wife, his relationship with Jill, her being a contract killer, Oz and his being a dentist? His being caught up with this group? The repercussions of the first film, the killing, the money, the concealing of Jimmy’s death?

6. Bruce Willis overacting as Jimmy, appearance, on the farm, domestic, cleaning, cooking with the hens? The relationship with Jill, wanting to be pregnant, wanting to be a contract killer, failing? His support of her, reprimanding her? The lifestyle? The memories of the relationship with Laszlo, with Yanni? The torn dollar note? The phone calls with Cynthia? The plan? The awkwardness, the killer’s coming for him, the escape with Oz, the clashes with Oz, the clashes with Jill, her pulling the gun on him, his drinking, in the bed with Oz? The irony of the plan, the contact with Cynthia? The confrontation with Strabo, his death? Their being taken by Julie, the confrontation with Laszlo? Jill in on the act, the pretence, the happy ending – with even more millions? Credible comic performance as a serial killer?

7. Matthew Perry’s coming style as Oz, the dentist, in love with Cynthia, the phone calls with Jill, supportive? At work, Julie as his assistant? The hoodlums coming for him, his taking them to Jimmy? The clashes with Jimmy, Cynthia being abducted, his puzzlement at Jill’s behaviour? The violence, the shootings? Strabo’s arrival, the guns, the shoot-out, the phone call, the plan for Strabo for Cynthia? The dentist’s office, being chloroformed? His not being in on the plan, the final car drive and everything explained to him?

8. Cynthia, relationship with Jimmy, love for Oz, the abduction, the discussions with Jimmy, the plan, her searching for the note, with Laszlo, with his mother? Her turning the tables?

9. Jill, her ambitions, wanting to be a mother, sense of failure, support from Oz? Her confrontation with Jimmy, his spurning of her, her coming in, the shooting – and her being part of the act? Her being pregnant?

10. Laszlo, bringing up the two boys, tearing the dollar in half, his imprisonment, his coming out, wanting to avenge Yanni’s death, Strabo and his ignorance, his hitting him? The toughs? The plans, the surveillance, finding Jimmy, the chase? Abducting Cynthia? The plan for Strabo’s exchange? His death? The confrontation with Jill, his being shot in the foot, the police arriving?

11. The thugs, their stupidity, Strabo and his being dumb, ugly, his ambitions for sexual prowess? His death? Julie and her wanting vengeance, her betraying Oz and the group?

12. The situations, the dialogue – a successful blend of comedy and action or not?